Wednesday, November 4, 2009

No Crumbs...

I have been dreaming about my wedding since I was 5. When I was in high school and college and had a bad day, I would go buy a bridal magazine. True story. I would peruse through those glossy pages and bookmark or tear out things I liked. Then, like any good theatre designer, I'd put them in an image book... to keep safe.

Just because I never thought or planned about a having a groom doesn't mean I'm not entitled to standing in front of friends and family and saying vows to the one I love. And it doesn't now. But, apparently 53% of Maine and my home state and half of bloody America think my 'commitment ceremony' (i loathe that phrase) is just fine and dandy as long as I don't want the rights and privileges of straight couples.

Well, I'm pissed. I'm glaring a lot. Just the fact that we have to go outside of the state we were raised in to get married is insulting enough. And now, with Prop 1 passing....

Last year, I was devastated. When Prop 8 passed, Deb and I couldn't talk about it. She went out and ate an entire thing of cookie dough. I smoked a lot of cigarettes. It wasn't pleasant by any means. I can't believe it has already been a year.

I have a lot of mixed emotions. Part of me doesn't want to make a big deal out of this. Part of me just wants to get married like the rest of the population. I just want to celebrate and then be a wife and not HAVE to be a part of this. Another part (the more prominent) knows that just by having a blessing in Texas we are making some sort of stand. We are drawing attention to ourselves (blog or no blog) and creating conversations and hopefully changing people's minds with every vendor, every person we talk to.

D and Me? We're the same as you. We want the same things in our life. We wanted to get married.

A saw this on twitter (I know, lame), but it made me laugh in a way that I feel like sums everything up:

"I don't want crumbs anymore, I want the whole damn wedding cake."

I will raise a toast to that.

8 comments:

Sirena said...

I miss you and reading this makes me realize that you are even cooler than i thought you were (which was pretty fucking cool BTW)... Some day we will not be second class citizens, and we will get to be like everyone else and the bigots of this country will have to deal... or kill themselves.. and that's something i can live with.
<3 Sirena

Brittney said...

**Raises a glass**

Rachel said...

My thoughts are with you. We were so sad listening to the news this morning. I wish our country was moving forwards instead of back.

Jeff said...

Love you. See you soon.

CaitStClair | A Peachy Bride said...

Cheers to that! And it WILL happen. Hopefully soon. And as worthless as it is, I am SO, so sorry.

Iowa Girl said...

Cheers to you and your fiance!

Rachel said...

Hugs -- I agree.

Mandy said...

This post made me think of a quote, so now I've GOT to share it:

"I get sick of listening to straight people complain about, "Well, hey, we don't have a heterosexual-pride day, why do you need a gay-pride day?" I remember when I was a kid I'd always ask my mom: "Why don't we have a Kid's Day? We have a Mother's Day and a Father's Day, but why don't we have a Kid's Day?" My mom would always say, "Every day is Kid's Day." To all those heterosexuals that bitch about gay pride, I say the same thing: Every day is heterosexual-pride day! Can't you people enjoy your banquet and not piss on those of us enjoying our crumbs over here in the corner?"
~Rob Nash