Tuesday, January 13, 2009

So are you going to stand in a circle and hold hands?

When we announced our engagement, we were greeted with many congratulations, a few comments I'd like to block from my mind, and a ton of questions. Some were clearly jokes (So are you going to stand in a circle and hold hands?), but when I heard "So, like, are you like, the bride or the groom?" for the tenth time, I realized that maybe explaining a gay wedding was not as easy as I hoped it would be.

Here are the top four questions I've gotten that make me want to slap the person who asked it with a bouquet of calla lilies and call them an idiot:

1. So, can you actually do this here?
No, we can't and thank you oh so much for reminding us. And before you ask-- Yes, we were planning on going to California, but... we all know how that turned out.
Who cares though? (We do, but let us pretend we don't care about our civil rights for a few seconds) We still want a kick ass celebration of our love and a damn good excuse to look pretty and party!

2. Are you both wearing dresses? Cause I mean, you're kind of butch.
I'm chubby- not butch and there is a difference, but thanks for trying. We are both wearing dresses. It is a personal choice, and many different couples choose different things.

3. So how am I gonna know who is the bride and who is the groom?
Well, seeing as there are two women-- there is no groom. I find this is the answer that makes peoples heads explode. They cannot grasp this notion.

4. Are your colors going to be rainbow?
No. And never speak that question again, or I will not be responsible for my actions.

Have you gotten any questions that make you want to shake your head and walk away?

Photo from: www.designergayweddings.com


Anonymous said...

"I'm chubby- not butch and there is a difference, but thanks for trying."


Loaf said...

I get the chubby = butch thing all the flippin time...

christina said...

i love #4. rainbow colors. i can't stop laughing. ugh, people are so insensitive!

thanks for posting! i'm grateful i haven't had to field any questions like this, as we live in liberal los angeles...sending you well wishes & support! you go, sister!


sewbettie said...

here's to happen that you don't have to wait any longer for equal rights. congrats on your marriage.

Maria's yoga said...

1) I actually live in California and am still in shock by the outcome. I actually thought the people in CA were different but I was totally wrong. Here's to the states that actually have opened their eyes.

2) wow that is incredibly rude. There are a lot of chubby brides including me.

3)another really silly question. You are both women, so obviously you are both brides. sheesh!

4)ok thats just mocking.

please tell me the questions don't get more ridiculous.